Life, and each of us, certainly has “thorny” attributes, however, our personal perspective about them has the power to make or break our spirit. So, where is our focus—on what’s “poking us” or on what’s flowering for us—offering beauty and fragrance? If we simply acknowledge the thorn and then apply our focus to the roses, they’ll provide sweet-relief and allow us to receive more answers, love, joy, hope and peace than we might initially suspect. This article shows us how.
In working with people to increase their willpower and overcome addictions, I’ve “walked” with people through their “scariest,” “darkest” and “thorniest” places “within”. In doing so, much learning has been done about “why” people behave the way they do, and ways to make change and growth easier.
It’s a “View-Master” life
Though some of us may not remember “View Masters”, they were one of my favorite childhood toys. They resemble binoculars and were the Travel Channel of the 70s. We raised them to our faces and looked through the square, plastic lenses to see the pretty pictures inside. The pictures were film and set in interchangeable, circular “reels”. They showcased exotic places and animals that were unknown to children who only played on monkey bars and rode Big Wheels.
The reason I liked View-Masters was because they helped me change my perspective on Life. Whenever I had a “tough” day of being five years old (oh, how those days compare to today!), I took some time alone to look at giraffes in Africa or waterfalls in Australia. When I did this, my problems seemed temporary instead of overwhelmingly permanent. Instead of feeling trapped in my circumstance, unable to escape the authority of my parents, I imagined and planned for the days when I would plot my own course and see these places and animals in person.
Life is like this. When we focus on the temporary problems, limitations and “stuckness” of where we may be, we feel helpless, hopeless and doomed to an unhappy experience. If instead, we can pick up the View-Master of our mind, sit quietly in a brightly-lit corner somewhere and imagine where we want “our lives” to go, we’re taking the first, empowered step towards our best, most fun and successful life.
So, what’s “going right” and what CAN we do in our view?
The roses represent the beauty of what’s working in this life, the beauty of what’s going right and the opportunities of what we CAN do. So what’s going right for us today? The sun rose, we are healthy and able to read, the birds are singing, the tea is brewing and whatever else is beauty to us. By focusing our mind’s View-Master on what’s going right, we are reminded that thorns are just a small part of the whole of life. Roses are far bigger than any thorn, and receive more compliments, smiles and smells from people, bees and other animals. By focusing on what’s going right, we feel more confident, successful, joyful and happier to be alive! (These are some huge bonuses.)
When “nothing’s going right” and “we can’t”
No doubt there have been and will be times when we think we are not up to the challenges that life presents. “I can’t!” we might wail (albeit internally). Or, “I won’t!” I’ve had these moments and recognize my “I can’ts”. There are many things I am not, don’t have and can’t do. For example, I am not a size 2, I don’t have a husband or children, I can’t do math in my head or speak five languages. Heck, when I think about it, my list of what I can’t do is FAR longer than my list of what I can—and this feels helpless and hopeless. With this “I can’t” View-Master perspective in mind, life can be one, thorny, hopeless, overwhelming mess!
Something to consider
Maybe our lives aren’t nearly as thorny as we believe. Could we change our perspective to a position of power—one that’s more rosy? If we believe that we don’t deserve a new perspective or a better life, let’s give ourselves the gift of unraveling that untruth and learning to heal by reading my previous, free article about how to forgive ourselves and joyfully smell life’s roses http://www.willyou.guru/forgiving-ourselves/
Rosy perspective dissipates fear
When we’re positively focused on what’s going right and what we can do, we live in hope and the possibilities of a new and brighter future. Are you ready to make the view in your View-Master rosier?
Take these easy, first steps.
1) Think of one area where you feel overwhelmed and unable to succeed.
2) Ask yourself, “What IS working in this situation? What IS beautiful and smells rosy?”
3) “How CAN I take a step towards succeeding in this area?
Yes, you can.
Let’s not give in to the ridiculously limiting belief that we “can’t”. That’s poppycock and we’re better than that. If we believe we can’t, we’ll never try or move forward, and we’re nearly doomed to fail. If instead, we curiously and kindly look for ways that we CAN move forward, and then do them, we are already succeeding.
What say ye?
What’s your perspective on Life? Could it be rosier? Please share your thoughts and feelings so we may grow in strength and willpower together …
Always with love,
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